Trust & Obey

Trust and obey
For there’s no other way
To be happy in Jesus
But to trust and obey

I never truly understood the words of that glorious hymn until lately and now that I understand it, it makes so much sense.

In wanting my own way I’ve found that I unknowingly “warred” against God in countless occasions. Of late I’ve been learning to surrender more to God and to trust Him in the things that I feel so afraid to lose control of. In that trust there’s also a need for obedience too. Trusting God is one thing but obeying Him can be a toughie as obeying God often means that we do things contrary to our natural desire for self-preservation and our self-centredness.

I’m thankful that God’s helping me figure out more stuff as each day passes and it feels more right to not “war” with God anymore. I realise the reason why I feel weary a lot of times is because I struggle to keep control of my life when He is trying to take control. The idea of God being in control of my life is scary I guess but that just goes to show how much more I have to learn to trust Him. But learning I am. And I know that’s definitely the reason why I don’t feel so weary in my spirit in recent weeks.

Jesus’ words make more sense now that it did before and I leave you guys with 2 verses from Our Daily Bread that finally “clicked” in me this morning.

If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross and follow me. For whoever wants to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for me will find it.

Letting Go

Letting Go
I’ve been mulling about writing this for such a long time. I know what I want to write but somehow I couldn’t bring myself to put these thoughts to writing because I haven’t quite yet resolved releasing things to God.
One of the biggest things I have been grappling with in the past 5 years of life has been relationships. To be more specific … romantic relationships. It’s funny but love can be a painful burden to bear especially when the emotions tear you up inside. Being around someone you love instead of being a joy becomes an ache when things aren’t going the way you hope it’d go. In a mixed-up world, it is sad to note that loving and caring for someone just isn’t enough to win that person’s heart. I’ve experienced it time and time again but yet I still go about it the same way all the time.
Having said all that, my best friends’ advice to me has always been to let it go to God. Release it to Him and let the chips fall where they may. My head hears it. My heart knows it. But somehow my emotions don’t … and the more I hang on to my feelings the harder things are. I guess the reason why I’m able to write this right now is because I think I’ve gotten my head and heart aligned more in recent months. It’s way better to be contented and to leave the unknowns to God.
I’m not entirely out of the woods just yet but I guess I can trust the end result to God and one day I’ll look back at this season of my life; laugh and be thankful that I’ve grown through it. In the meantime there are a lot of things to order in my life and a lot more growing up to do now that I’ve settled down with work, my record label and also the things God has blessed me with at church. I’ve got everything a young adult would want … nifty hi-tech toys, a decent car and a condominium but yet all that doesn’t mean a thing without someone to share life with.
As much as I struggle I know God is telling me this “trust in me, and it’ll come to pass”. I just gotta keep on trusting and I just learn how to be content and thankful with the blessings that are being poured out into my life at this very moment.
I leave all my readers with this verse that has great meaning to me. Have a read and have a good week ahead of all of ya!
Philippians 4:6-7
Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.
Letting go.

Letting go.

I’ve been mulling about writing this for such a long time. I know what I want to write but somehow I couldn’t bring myself to put these thoughts to writing because I haven’t quite yet resolved releasing things to God.

One of the biggest things I have been grappling with in the past 5 years of life has been relationships. To be more specific … romantic relationships. It’s funny but love can be a painful burden to bear especially when the emotions tear you up inside. Being around someone you love instead of being a joy becomes an ache when things aren’t going the way you hope it’d go. In a mixed-up world, it is sad to note that loving and caring for someone just isn’t enough to win that person’s heart. I’ve experienced it time and time again but yet I still go about it the same way all the time.

Having said all that, my best friends’ advice to me has always been to let it go to God. Release it to Him and let the chips fall where they may. My head hears it. My heart knows it. But somehow my emotions don’t … and the more I hang on to my feelings the harder things are. I guess the reason why I’m able to write this right now is because I think I’ve gotten my head and heart aligned more in recent months. It’s way better to be contented and to leave the unknowns to God.

I’m not entirely out of the woods just yet but I guess I can trust the end result to God and one day I’ll look back at this season of my life; laugh and be thankful that I’ve grown through it. In the meantime there are a lot of things to order in my life and a lot more growing up to do now that I’ve settled down with work, my record label and also the things God has blessed me with at church. I’ve got everything a young adult would want … nifty hi-tech toys, a decent car and a condominium but yet all that doesn’t mean a thing without someone to share life with.

As much as I struggle I know God is telling me this “trust in me, and it’ll come to pass”. I just gotta keep on trusting and I just learn how to be content and thankful with the blessings that are being poured out into my life at this very moment.

I leave all my readers with this verse that has great meaning to me. Have a read and have a good week ahead of all of ya!

Philippians 4:6-7
Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.

God’s POV

God's view is bigger!

God's view is bigger!

I’ve been listening a lot to Ps. Edmund Chan in the past month and it’s been refreshing to just listen to the Word of God and to be centred on Him. I can’t say that I’m like 100% there yet and there’s still a lot of work that He needs to do in me to transform me.

It’s been a great weekend and I learnt some new things at yesterday’s Discipleship Conference in church. The key thing that I took away from Ps. Edmund Chan’s session is understanding more and accepting that God’s Word transforms us and “masters” us rather than us mastering the Word of God. Truth without application doesn’t do a thing but truth applied makes a world of difference.

How often have I read the Bible with pre-suppositions and with ideas already in place? It’s difficult I know but maybe it’s time for us to just read the Bible for what it has to teach us rather than trying to force-fit the Word to fit our ideas of what things should be like. I figure that’s probably why we struggle so much to find truth in the Bible because in actual fact we’re trying to validate our own truth rather learning what truth really is.

I’m learning how to see God’s point of view rather than justaxposing my pre-concieved ideas on the Word. It’s gonna be an exciting journey and even though I do have many questions about the world and the relevance of the Word in it; I believe that a God-centred approach in discovering Him in the Bible is going to make a world of difference in life.

Won’t you read the Word differently today?

He that Carries Our Burdens

Calvary.

Calvary.

1 Peter 5:7
Cast all your anxiety on Him because He cares for you.
Jesus at Calvary.

Not a picture we’d like to remember but one that reminds us that we can cast all our cares on Him. A lot of things are happening right now in my life and I am so thankful that I was given 1 Peter 5:7 this morning. I just felt that the verse was something that I should share with all of you who may be feeling overwhelmed. I hope it speaks volumes to you as it does to me today.

Take care…

Control

It’s been awhile since I last put up a blog post. I’ve not been feeling like writing anything lately but that’s cos’ I’m pretty busy with the Children’s Church Christmas party helping the kids out in the play. I am so glad that I’m able to put my creative thinking cap on.

Anyways, I’ve been thinking a lot about control and how much we (we as in we humans) want so much to be in control of our lives. We want our choices. We want to be able to determine the outcome of things through our actions. We want to believe that we have control over our lives and our place in our part of the world. I realise more and more that we do not have control over a lot of things. While we may be able to put our hands to the plough and work hard at things … many occurences in life just aren’t within our control.

I’ve been feeling this a lot in my singlehood and Ps Mike (the guy who has been spending loads of time with me to sort out my internal issues) has been sharing with me a lot about surrender and making a daily decision to surrender my deep, deep desire to be with someone. It’s just the same as forgiveness … where whenever I feel the urge to still be angry I remind myself that I have chosen to forgive despite the fact that she may not even be sorry for the pain that she caused. Forgiveness is an act. Just the same as surrender.

I guess there goes all the control that we want … all out the window. We can’t control whether a person will fall in love with us. We can’t control the share market. We can’t even control the outcome of our work short of just putting in our best. The actions of people around us affect everything and nothing is truly predictable. The point I’m trying to make is … is there truly control? And does it make sense to some of you to believe in a God who loves us so much and takes care of us regardless of whether we appreciate it or not. And that’s what I hope to really learn out all this; to learn how to be secure in who I am rather than to let someone else judge me with a measure that he or she can’t possibly hold up to as well. It’s not the easiest of things though.

Cheers! I’m off to Children’s Church now … by the way I just received a shipment of Liang’s new album After 8 so look out for it in stores soon. Enjoy a sneak preview of the album cover right here … The CD is loaded with goodies, a coaster, postcard (I think) and of course the album itself. Check it OUT!

After 8.

After 8.

Re-starting a Life Put on Hold

It’s been a long week this week. I’ve been hanging out late at night chatting with a new friend and venting a lot. At the same time also learning more about what it’s like to be free of the shackles of pain that I put myself through over her (her = the girl I was/am in love with). Am learning to let go some more of all the pent up anger & disappointment in me. Am learning also to start living my life again and to lay to rest the hope that she’d open her heart to me again.

Writing these words makes me feel like there’s a finality to it all. Maybe God will bring her back to me one day … maybe there’s someone else out there who waiting for me. Whatever it is God has given me hope again. And that’s a good thing. It’s time to super-glue together my life after 2 years of picking up the broken pieces. I will always mourn the loss of her heart and forever regret my inability to hold myself together in my desperation to want to be with her. All I wanted was for her to love me … but it’s over now. For good.

Anyways, this week has been a solid week. Not as productive as I would like but it was a good week. I caught Transformers again last Wednesday. The 2nd time wasn’t as amazing as the first but it was worth a 2nd watch nevertheless. The difference this time round is that I could take in all the detail that I missed when I first watched it. The sound effects in that movie are top-notch & the movie was delivered in true Michael Bay fashion. A stirring score by Hans Zimmer rounds off the package. It most definitely wins my vote for best sci-fi/fantasy/action movie this year.

The evening with my cell members was great & everyone celebrating Ee Von’s birthday that night made it a perfect cell outing. It was heart-warming to see her so happy and to hear the laughter coming from all around the dinner table. Aaah … The simple joys of being a cell-leader. Here are some pictures of our “makan” that day. It was good fun and a proud moment for me being a part of this group. Enjoy!

This is the lot of em'. THE SALTSHAKERS. Err ... except for Roland.

This is the lot of em'. THE SALTSHAKERS. Err ... except for Roland.

This is some weird girl thing ... don't take my picture please?! Sorry Daph, but I've taken it already!

This is some weird girl thing ... don't take my picture please?! Sorry Daph, but I've taken it already!

That's Ee Von the birthday girl looking up at us ... can you guess which one she is?

That's Ee Von the birthday girl looking up at us ... can you guess which one she is?

That's Lina on the far right, Ling Yew, Nat (Ling Yew's definite better half ) & Ee Von.

That's Lina on the far right, Ling Yew, Nat (Ling Yew's definite better half ) & Ee Von.

That's Elly on the far right, Matt, Angie & Terence. Sorry Ling Yew ... my camera phone doesn't have a wide-angle lens.

That's Elly on the far right, Matt, Angie & Terence. Sorry Ling Yew ... my camera phone doesn't have a wide-angle lens.

Here's a picture perfect shot of Daphne, Ee Von and Lina who is faaaar at the back. Oh! Lina's from Korea by the way. Can any of you tell?

Here's a picture perfect shot of Daphne, Ee Von and Lina who is faaaar at the back. Oh! Lina's from Korea by the way. Can any of you tell?

A Shot of the THREE MOST MACHO GUYS in the SaltShakers! Can you smell the testosterone?!!

A Shot of the THREE MOST MACHO GUYS in the SaltShakers! Can you smell the testosterone?!!

Here's Tim! He's the youngest guy in cell so he's like the small brother in our "family". Lina says he's adorably cute!

Here's Tim! He's the youngest guy in cell so he's like the small brother in our "family". Lina says he's adorably cute!

Mr. Kenneth looking immensely pleased after a delightful meal of pancakes!

Mr. Kenneth looking immensely pleased after a delightful meal of pancakes!

The birthday girl's birthday pancake? STRANGE but TRUE!

The birthday girl's birthday pancake? STRANGE but TRUE!

"HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU! HAPPY BIRTHDAY ..." Oh! Was I singing too loud?

"HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU! HAPPY BIRTHDAY ..." Oh! Was I singing too loud?

So there you have it! Happy Birthday Ee Von!!! And may all the blessings and good things we wished for you that night come true … err … soon!!!

To cap off this blog entry I’ll end off with another movie. Last night I caught Die Hard 4.0 with Ivan & another friend. Die Hard was an action-fest and I loved every minute of it. There were just times when my jaw stayed agape at the reality-defying scenes playing before my eyes. It was most definitely a thrill ride for me.

The week still isn’t over. Tomorrow is our regular book study and Ling Yew’s cooking lunch for us at his place in Sg Buloh. And on Sunday we’re off to Gentings! Hooray! It’s gonna be another great weekend! It’d be tiring but good. Can’t wait!

Cheers!