Re-starting a Life Put on Hold

It’s been a long week this week. I’ve been hanging out late at night chatting with a new friend and venting a lot. At the same time also learning more about what it’s like to be free of the shackles of pain that I put myself through over her (her = the girl I was/am in love with). Am learning to let go some more of all the pent up anger & disappointment in me. Am learning also to start living my life again and to lay to rest the hope that she’d open her heart to me again.

Writing these words makes me feel like there’s a finality to it all. Maybe God will bring her back to me one day … maybe there’s someone else out there who waiting for me. Whatever it is God has given me hope again. And that’s a good thing. It’s time to super-glue together my life after 2 years of picking up the broken pieces. I will always mourn the loss of her heart and forever regret my inability to hold myself together in my desperation to want to be with her. All I wanted was for her to love me … but it’s over now. For good.

Anyways, this week has been a solid week. Not as productive as I would like but it was a good week. I caught Transformers again last Wednesday. The 2nd time wasn’t as amazing as the first but it was worth a 2nd watch nevertheless. The difference this time round is that I could take in all the detail that I missed when I first watched it. The sound effects in that movie are top-notch & the movie was delivered in true Michael Bay fashion. A stirring score by Hans Zimmer rounds off the package. It most definitely wins my vote for best sci-fi/fantasy/action movie this year.

The evening with my cell members was great & everyone celebrating Ee Von’s birthday that night made it a perfect cell outing. It was heart-warming to see her so happy and to hear the laughter coming from all around the dinner table. Aaah … The simple joys of being a cell-leader. Here are some pictures of our “makan” that day. It was good fun and a proud moment for me being a part of this group. Enjoy!

This is the lot of em'. THE SALTSHAKERS. Err ... except for Roland.

This is the lot of em'. THE SALTSHAKERS. Err ... except for Roland.

This is some weird girl thing ... don't take my picture please?! Sorry Daph, but I've taken it already!

This is some weird girl thing ... don't take my picture please?! Sorry Daph, but I've taken it already!

That's Ee Von the birthday girl looking up at us ... can you guess which one she is?

That's Ee Von the birthday girl looking up at us ... can you guess which one she is?

That's Lina on the far right, Ling Yew, Nat (Ling Yew's definite better half ) & Ee Von.

That's Lina on the far right, Ling Yew, Nat (Ling Yew's definite better half ) & Ee Von.

That's Elly on the far right, Matt, Angie & Terence. Sorry Ling Yew ... my camera phone doesn't have a wide-angle lens.

That's Elly on the far right, Matt, Angie & Terence. Sorry Ling Yew ... my camera phone doesn't have a wide-angle lens.

Here's a picture perfect shot of Daphne, Ee Von and Lina who is faaaar at the back. Oh! Lina's from Korea by the way. Can any of you tell?

Here's a picture perfect shot of Daphne, Ee Von and Lina who is faaaar at the back. Oh! Lina's from Korea by the way. Can any of you tell?

A Shot of the THREE MOST MACHO GUYS in the SaltShakers! Can you smell the testosterone?!!

A Shot of the THREE MOST MACHO GUYS in the SaltShakers! Can you smell the testosterone?!!

Here's Tim! He's the youngest guy in cell so he's like the small brother in our "family". Lina says he's adorably cute!

Here's Tim! He's the youngest guy in cell so he's like the small brother in our "family". Lina says he's adorably cute!

Mr. Kenneth looking immensely pleased after a delightful meal of pancakes!

Mr. Kenneth looking immensely pleased after a delightful meal of pancakes!

The birthday girl's birthday pancake? STRANGE but TRUE!

The birthday girl's birthday pancake? STRANGE but TRUE!

"HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU! HAPPY BIRTHDAY ..." Oh! Was I singing too loud?

"HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU! HAPPY BIRTHDAY ..." Oh! Was I singing too loud?

So there you have it! Happy Birthday Ee Von!!! And may all the blessings and good things we wished for you that night come true … err … soon!!!

To cap off this blog entry I’ll end off with another movie. Last night I caught Die Hard 4.0 with Ivan & another friend. Die Hard was an action-fest and I loved every minute of it. There were just times when my jaw stayed agape at the reality-defying scenes playing before my eyes. It was most definitely a thrill ride for me.

The week still isn’t over. Tomorrow is our regular book study and Ling Yew’s cooking lunch for us at his place in Sg Buloh. And on Sunday we’re off to Gentings! Hooray! It’s gonna be another great weekend! It’d be tiring but good. Can’t wait!

Cheers!

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